John Piper, did I waste my life today?
I did get up this morning, light a candle and spend a few minutes in silence, then read from a book that led me in an imaginative prayer exercise with Jesus. Sounds kinda Catholic and not very Sola Scriptura, but oh well, check quiet time off the list. I did get distracted though and wasted some time on Instagram when I could have been praying some more. I’m sorry, I’ll try to do better tomorrow.
I drove to work and listened to a pop culture popcast dedicated to “delightful idiocy” when I suppose I should have been listening to KLove, but if I’m being honest, most Christian music kinda sucks (not you Jon Foreman, I’ll love you forever). I should probably repent of that thought but I don’t want to.
I didn’t really do any great things for God today, but I did grade some student papers, helping them to communicate more clearly, and offering thoughts on their research projects. The theme of the class is inequality in America. Probably a bit “woke” for your tastes, but I think Jesus would kind of dig it. I suppose I should be telling students to be more concerned about the state of their souls than the state of their grades, but I do try to be kind to them when their work is late because they were sick and still had to work two jobs. I’m sorry, I’ll try to evangelize better tomorrow.
I had a meeting with colleagues this afternoon where we discussed ways to improve as educators. They probably don’t even know I’m a Christian. I have to admit, sometimes I do wonder what would people do if they knew that I’m a Jesus Freak? Actually freak is bit of a strong term that I wouldn’t use on myself, but I do still try to follow him and let that speak for itself. DC Talk I feel your disappointment (actually Kevin I know you’re totally cool about it).
I’m heading home now. I never did attend Passion or Acquire the Fire (maybe that explains some things), but I do have to acquire some toilet paper and almond milk from Target. I will say, sometimes during moments at church (yeah I still go to church, surprise!) I find myself speaking in what I think is tongues, which is honestly wild and more than anything else at this point makes me believe God is real.
When I get home I’ll kiss my wife and pet our dog. We just have a dog, no kids. Not for lack of trying, just hasn’t happened. Guess we won’t be raising the next generation for Jesus, and will always feel a little weird at all the family-centered church events. We’re learning to make our peace with it.
After dinner I’ll probably play my Harry Potter video game for a bit. Yeah, I eventually read those books and I liked them. Fantasy literature is awesome so suck it (actually, maybe you like Harry Potter, John, and if so, I apologize, that was really directed to the fundamentalists). It would probably be more holy to spend those hours reading my Bible, but my brain is tired from all that grading, and I’m still recovering from a weekend of playing Holy Week services at church. I guess tomorrow is another chance to be more in the Word.
You know John, I still really do love Jesus a lot, like, probably more than ever, which is surprising even to me considering all the shit that’s been done in his name these past few years. What that love looks like is just…different than the vision you and those other guys gave me all those years ago.
And I’m finally okay with that.
be free my friend!
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